the perfect valentine's night in

This is a guide for two types of people: the introverts who love a good night in and the broke ass bitches who can’t afford a night out. I’m both. I want to spend Valentine’s Day with my boyfriend and my boyfriend only anyway, not him and dozens of strangers.

Cocktails are my favourite way to get drunk but when you’re piss poor even Happy Hour deals don’t have your back. No doubt making your own at home will be cheaper but also much more fun. Well, only if they taste nice. VIPXO featured this cocktail making set on one of her eBay wishlists and it’s a complete bargain at £14.99.

I always order a Long Island Iced Tea probably (no, definitely) because it’s the one on the menu with the highest alcohol content. If I was feeling spendy, I’d opt to buy the ingredients for this especially because the leftover tequila can be used to play Battleshots with. If you’ve never had the pleasure of playing Battleshots, it’s literally just Battleships except the ships are replaced with shots. Genius, I know.

diy cocktails

However, because Long Island Iced Tea has 4 different spirits, I think I’ll be opting for a Rumberklaart (recipe above) this year. Not too long ago, I went to Fear X Loathing and I was horrified to see that my cocktail of choice was nowhere to been found on the menu and so I was forced to settle with a Rumberklaart. At least, I thought I was settling but in hindsight, I might have even been upgrading. It was so good that I had 4.

Once you’re nice and tipsy and a game of Truth or Dare has inevitably turned sexual, maybe a massage could be your next move. These Lush Massage Bars are a nice alternative to oils because they’re pretty much just solid moisturiser which means they’re great for solo use too.
Soft Coeur Massage Bar - £4.95
For lovers of sweet smells, this massage bar featuring a familiar, comforting toffee fragrance. We added almond oil to our cocoa butter and shea butter massage bar base to allow this bar to melt quickly on the skin. The honey and cocoa centre will leave the skin smelling delicious. Smooth this sweet-smelling massage bar over the body for deliciously-scented and soft skin.

Love Spell Massage Bar - £5.95
Follow your heart straight to this creamy, Fair Trade, organic cocoa butter bar, filled with rich rose hip syrup and spicy carnation absolute. Fair Trade organic aloe vera gel soothes your blushes while uplifting neroli and organic lemon myrtle takes you to a higher plane. Cast a spell over a skin, or over a partner, with this romantic, floral bar.

Fever Massage Bar - £6.95
Indulge in a bit of floral. Smooth rose absolute-infused Fair Trade organic cocoa and shea butters all over for hydrated, kissable skin. Married with rousing sandalwood oil, it’ll leave you feeling smokin' hot and ready to get-down; this one knows how to treat you right.
This is also a chance to get changed into something less comfortable. If you didn’t get that reference, I mean lingerie. If your massage skills are subpar, lingerie is a great way to distract your partner. If I could I’d spend hundreds on lingerie. Blair Wardorf’s collection is goals but Primark actually has a selection of relatively affordable pieces this year.

Lastly, if music isn’t playing by this point, here is the perfect playlist:

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